Tangerine Dreams

So I had to return something to J Crew yesterday. Just real quick, in and out, I said to myself.

Well, since I’m here, I further “dialoged” with myself, I really should go check out the sales racks — which of course are strategically (and wisely, on JC’s part) placed in the way-back of the store.

I eventually got to the stuff on sale… after having gotten sidetracked by one spring-y, pretty, trendy, tangerine-colored thingy after another.

Unless you reside in a cave, I’m sure you’ve seen all the catalogs, magazines and ads “yelling” how popular the “oranges” are this year. The It Color for 2012, they say. Tangerine, Rachael Ray orange, coral, papaya, mango, peony, salmon, Home Depot orange, poppy, apricot, Clemson orange (Go, Tigers!) — and varying shades of all the aforementioned hues. Some brighter than others…

{Most of these shades, I’ve learned, will work.}

So I was lovin’ life and happy with all my options as I headed into the dressing room…until I held a very bright tangerine blouse up to my face and took a gander in the mirror. What was I thinking? My.face.looked.horrid. Google “sallow skin,” and that was me! I was disappointed in myself (and embarrassed, quite frankly) that I honestly thought I could still pull off wearing those intense, bright, saturated colors.

In a matter of seconds, reality struck. Lesson learned: You’re too old to wear the brights, Girl. And my Tangerine Dreams became a nightmare.

So I returned my previous J Crew item and made two new small purchases. Sadly, however, nothing in the orange-hued family.

Time was running out. I had to get home. But I persevered. I was determined to NOT leave the mall without something in the It Color to put on my body. Lipstick! That’s it! I’ll run into Nordstrom’s really quick and get thee most perfect pop of coral-y/tangerine-y lip color, like, ever!

So I went to the Lancome counter, hoping to get the more mature consultant of the two. (The comfort-in- numbers/misery-loves-company thing.) But noooooo. I got the young, long-legged, heavily-accented Jennifer Lopez-lipped, Russian/Croatian/Czechoslavakian (one of those countries) beauty! Whatever.

I explained that I wanted their most on-trend orange color they had. My first choice to try, of course, was their brightest coral. (Okay. I’m a slow learner.) She indulged me as she deftly applied it with her handy-dandy Q-tip. After looking at myself in the mirror, and then looking at her, I felt awful, because I knew she was aghast at my appearance, and she didn’t quite know how to address the situation.

“It’s too bright, huh?”

Perfect entree for her: “Uhhhh, yes, ma’am. Yes. Way. Way. Let’s try a more natural color, something more subtle. I think that will look much better with your skin.”

After a bit of back-and-forth, together we arrived at a much more muted color, but still in the tangerine fam, which I so desperately wanted. It’s called Rouge In Love #322. And I think I like it. A lot. For now.

And I will save the bright corals/tangerines/poppys for pedicures and throw pillows.

2 Responses to Tangerine Dreams
  1. Anonymous
    March 29, 2012 | 4:22 am

    Lord love a duck Jodie….you need some plastic tan first…I use Loreal's sublime bronze. Works fairly quickly, keeps skin most and stays about a week. Then those tangerine colors look great on us 'blonds'….also watch out for the Russians. Trust me on that! Lois

  2. Anonymous
    March 29, 2012 | 5:18 am

    Was just thinking of "the color" this spring and heading out soon to see what's out there. Maybe I will just be satisfied with Black Honey and fogettaboutit……D.

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It's true! Despite playing defense virtually all my life against the onslaught of this sometimes-ugly aging process, it...has...arrived! I naively thought I would escape cellulite (the Cottage Cheese) and crow's feet (the Crepe Paper). But I didn't! And why didn't anyone tell me about this emotional roller-coaster that comes with being an Empty-Nester?! My name is Jodie Barringer Myers. I'm a 54-year-old Friday/chardonnay/ hydrangea-loving wife/mom/court reporter living in Sacramento (Gold River!), California. Writing is cathartic for me. And because I look to find humor and humility among the rubble that is my now very peri-menopausal self, I'm hopeful that you will laugh, cry, learn, enjoy and, most of all, relate to what I have to say. After all, we're all in this together, right?

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